Not thinking in the straight line.

Sigh.
When will we really start talking to each other again?

Maybe it's just me,
hoping for something that isn't there.
Deluding myself,
just to feel happy.

I really am feeling too much.
But you do confuse me.
I don't think we were close to begin with,
but it's...

well,
i just hope we can start talking,
face to face,
and not just on MSN.

Pray not to feel again.

Drumming on the zinc plated roof,
streaming down to earth
as if eager to embrace Mother Nature again.
The rain falls.
I hate it.

Relating to slow sad songs,
Watching the droplets hit the ground,
Trying to count them,
Thinking about the past again.
I hate it.

It could've been worse,
like being run over after you fall.
I probably should be grateful.
I am, but something's missing.
I hate it.

No, forgiveness is a thing of a past,
i keep telling myself.
Vainly trying to block out the self-blame
and regret.
I hate it.

Yes, i'm happy.
No, i'm sad.
Maybe, i don't know.
But, i'm gonna keep on trying.
I still hate all this.